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April 04, 2005 12:48am
Ask a Swinger: Spring is for Swingers
Source: JulieWild.com
by: Julie Wild

Spring is here and it's time to bring out the tank tops and swim suits. I love going to the beach but my favorite story happened in Daytona Beach at a hotel pool.

I was with my girlfriend and things got out of hand. Soon we had to have each other, so I slowly took off her swim suit top and before long, we were nude in the pool. Sucking, kissing and touching each others bodies.

What we did not know is that the hotel had closed circuit TV and the front desk manager and other employees were watching two beautiful ladies enjoy each other.

The next morning, while walking through the lobby, you would not believe the attention we were receiving. When we checked out, the front desk manager invited us to come back anytime. So what do you have planned for spring?

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Dear Julie,

I am writing to get your advice on a problem with my husband. All he talks about is swinging. He reads the sites, buys the magazines and rents the videos. He is obsessed with swinging.

I am willing to visit a swing club, but I feel this pressure to play with the first couple we meet. Can you give me any advice?

Sandy M.

Dear Sandy,

I appreciate your husbands level of interest, but if he does not calm down, he will surely be disappointed. Especially if you visit a club and others feel his strong desire for sex, it might turn off some couples.

Swinging is about the "lifestyle," getting to know other couples and singles, having a good time and sharing with others through sex. Swing clubs are not one big orgy. You must get to know the other members and take things slowly.

My best advice is to set strong ground rules. My suggestion is no group play the first time you visit a club. Group play and full swap in separate rooms is not for the novice.

Visit a club, just watch what goes on, enjoy each others company and then if you think your relationship is strong enough, plan a return visit with pre-agreed upon boundaries.

Just a comment, most couples tell me that they wish they had not had sex with other couples the first time in the lifestyle, they wish they took it slow and prepared themselves for the feelings that accompany seeing your spouse with someone else.

Dear Julie,

I have a problem, my wife slept with my boss and it is all my fault.

I have been married for 10 years, I am always suggesting to my wife that she think about expanding our sex life, including threesomes, swinging and bi-sexuality.

My company had a sales retreat at a famous resort. So we all spent the night. The party had an open bar. I encouraged my wife to drink, otherwise she is so uptight. I guess I suggested one too many drinks.

My boss is a nice looking single male. Everyone thought he was gay. Well that can't be further from the truth.

The party was going great, my wife was dancing and the evening was getting late. Then my wife mentioned that my boss had not danced all night. So she asked him for a dance. They looked like they were having too much fun on the dance floor.

I watched my wife and my boss dance, they looked like they were making small talk. Soon I noticed my wife and my boss were French kissing. He was feeling her up and she was rubbing his crotch.

When the song was over, I noticed they headed for the bar together. I thought they were going for a drink, but instead they disappeared. I looked for them and since I could not find them, I headed back to our room.

What a shock, I opened the door to find my boss and my wife in bed together. I guess I should not have become upset, but I did and my wife and boss dressed and left. They headed for his room.

My wife spent the night with my boss and when we started home, I asked her what happened and she said she can't remember anything that happened.

What should I do?

John G.

Dear John,

This is one problem with alcohol at a company event. If your wife and your boss are ok with it, I would learn to accept it and have a better understanding next time. I can't believe your boss will say much, but your wife might not feel the same.

I would talk about it, so it does not cause long term marriage problems. Swinging is all about trust. What happened the other night was a mixture of sex and alcohol. Good luck, I am sure you two can work it out.

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If you have a question for Julie, please e mail me at Julie@JulieWild.com. If you would like to find out more on Julie's Phone sex Coaching, please visit JulieWild.com or call me at 404-806-7386 for more information.

Pornography feminists unshackle their desires and celebrate their sexuality in the patriarchal world

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