September 06, 2000 09:00pm
The Extreme Assault on Pornography
Source: Extreme Associates
by: Company Press Release
(VAN NUYS, CA) -- On October 2nd and 3rd, events will take place here at Extreme Associates that will radically and irrevocably change pornography forever. We call these days E-DAYS. These events will rock the adult entertainment industry to its very core and, more importantly, finally render extinct the antiquated porn dinosaurs who have ruled this business for the past twenty years.
What we are about to do is revolutionary: a frontal assault on mediocrity,
unoriginality, and generic, factory-line produced product. It is a big FUCK-YOU to the bloated scumbags who derive the greatest pride in ripping off the consumer. It will be THE EXTREME DAY MASSACRE, and each of these lecherous parasites will lie drowning in his own greed.
We already spend more money on what's IN our box than any other porn company. The quality of our product speaks for its self. But you already know that.
Now we are going to do for the OUTSIDE of the box what we have consistently done for the inside: move to a higher standard which will leave all of these archaic XXX zombies reeling in the dust. And we are sparing no expense. Our new box design is so revolutionary, so innovative, so mind-blowing, it will make videos, as they are currently packaged, obsolete. Our product will literally fly off the shelves into the consumers' hands. They will be transfixed, hypnotized and drawn to these boxes like flies to a rotting corpse. There will be mass confusion on the streets as the porn world is blindsided by the biggest event in mankind since Moses descended Mount Sinai and Neil Armstrong first laid foot on that crusty rock. It all begins with the release of Tom Byron's WHACK ATTACK 8 on OCTOBER 3RD, which, by the way, Byron calls the best porno he's ever made.
Extreme is in the process of serious change. There is a new regime, and a new kick-ass attitude. We have declared war on every other fucking company in the business and we will not rest until each and every one of these parasites is dripping blood and dumped back into the septic tank from which he came. We will spare no fucking expense. We will dare these fuckers to keep up with us. We are now EXTREME INC. With acclaimed, award-winning directors Tom Byron, Louis Cypher, Lizzy Borden, Luciano, Slain Wayne, and refugee newcomer Thomas Zupko, EXTREME has put out this warning to the dinosaurs of the business: Beware, motherfuckers, watch your fucking back. Your time has come."
On OCTOBER 2ND, a press conference will be held to announce the re-launching of our website (www.extremeassociates.com), which, with new technology solely exclusive to Extreme, will be more interactive, fan-friendly, and comprehensive than anything currently on the Internet. It will feature live updates three times a day from all our performers and directors, along with chat lines, live feeds from our video shoots, and more free hardcore content than any other XXX site.
AND ON THAT DAY, AT 11AM PACIFIC TIME, 2PM EASTERN, AN ANOUNCEMENT WILL BE MADE VIA LIVE INTERNET PRESS CONFERENCE, THAT WILL BE SO SHOCKING, SO CONTROVERSIAL, SO SCANDALOUS, IT WILL CHANGE THE FACE OF PORNOGRAPHY FOREVER.